saddestblogger:

"hey i’m really full do you want the rest of my-"

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bae: come over
me: do you have food
bae: my parents aren't home
me: are they coming back with food

ivysaaur:

priceofliberty:

hellabiafra:

vegasmo:

Human: “HAHAHA Animals are so dumb!”

*goes to war with its own species, uses up all of its resources, destroys its own environment, pollutes its own air and water*

Animal: *licks its own asshole*

human: *licks someone else’s asshole and calls it sex*

this is mY FAVORITE THING

do you solemnly swear to stay in your lane, your whole lane, and nothing but your lane

swagbat:

Khal Drogo: “I nominate Viserys for the GOLDbucket challenge!!”

elitewifi:

finmeister:

MY MOM JUST GOT OUT HER BIRTH CERTIFICATE AND FOUND OUT SHES BEEN SPELLING HER NAME WRONG FOR 49 YEARS

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luckydreaming:

my anaconda don’t…

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my anaconda don’t…

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My anaconda dont’ want none unless you got buns hun

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continueplease:

After reading that dogs lick the mouths of whomever they feel is in charge, I just feel like this dog is thinking “I CAN’T HANDLE THIS MUCH RESPONSIBILITY.”

continueplease:

After reading that dogs lick the mouths of whomever they feel is in charge, I just feel like this dog is thinking “I CAN’T HANDLE THIS MUCH RESPONSIBILITY.”

cakejam:

this is the bitch that stole my phone and every pic she takes goes straight to my icloud!

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